Category Archives: Music

The “Fast Girl” label fails Black Girls

Posted in Culture, Music, Random, Reality TV, Uncategorized by

tyler-nix-684359-unsplash

It’s been forever, I know. I’ve missed this platform but #SurvivingRKelly has brought me out of writing retirement. I originally planned on skipping the R. Kelly docu-series altogether because we know what he is at this point. The cult story came out nearly 2 years ago and that was 20 years after he married Aaliyah at age 15 but the social media discussions were so widely varied, I got curious. 

The documentary presents so many issues which deserve further examination but I want to focus on the narrative about the “fast/fass girl” angle. In my part of the African-American community, fast was literally the worst thing you could be or be perceived to be as a young girl. In short, a “fast” girl is a girl who is a sexual being. If you’re unfamiliar with the term, just imagine a less sophisticated but way more problematic version of slut-shaming. I’ve been slut-shamed as an adult and accused of being “fast” as a child. Being accused of being fast was way, way, way worse. Continue reading →

BET Awards Brain Drops

Posted in Culture, Music, Uncategorized by

bet-awards-2015

Hey Lovers, 

I didn’t get the chance to watch the BET Awards with you live for the entire show because I wasn’t home then I fell asleep. This morning, because I love you, I caught up on the performances and red carpet fashions that I missed. I don’t have anymore pictures because I’m writing this on my lunch break (don’t tell anyone) and if you’re reading this you have the Internet too. I’m just going to give you a few of my thoughts on the performances I missed in no particular order. Think of it as a freestyle.  Continue reading →

#Sorry4TheWait2

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From datpiff.com

Hey Lovers, 

Last week, I was at work, minding my business when I saw a blog post about Lil Wayne dropping a new mixtape. I was totally confused. Last I had heard Lil Wayne and Baby were in the midst of a breakup. If you haven’t heard it yet, you can listen to it here here.

When I first started listening to Lil Wayne he only had 1 child; think about that.  I, like many know that Lil Wayne’s best work is on mixtapes. That made me want to listen. I was hoping that the recent events would make him get back to his No Ceilings self. After listening to this mixtape the only thing I can say is, fix it Jesus.  Continue reading →

Sweet Yeezus

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If you haven’t heard by now, Monday, Kanye West visited The Breakfast Club on New York’s Power 105.1. If you haven’t heard it, check it  out here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n1W_QWDWHiI.

Let me begin by saying I loved this interview! He gave us the Kanye Crazy we love and a social message that people need to hear. Let us not forget that there is a thin line between genius and insanity (see Howard Hughes). After listening to this interview I think Kanye needs an outliner. He needs someone to organize his thoughts old school style. You know Roman Numeral “I”, sub point “A”, sub-sub point 1. . .

There were some Yes Yeezus moments and and even more WTF moments. Let’s discuss! The following moments had me saying “Yes Yeezus”

  •  Black people don’t have old Jewish money. You already knew that. 
  • He gets sonned by Nike. This made me feel a little sad. If Kanye West gets sonned by Nike what chance is there for the rest of us?
  • There are no Black suit designers. Immediately I thought about Sean John but then again there are exactly zero Wall Street bankers wearing Sean John suits while they close the deals that will probably ruin the economy (again).
  • Obama & no money v. Bush’s oil money. George Bush led us into 2 wars with little opposition. Obama gave everyone healthcare and they shut down the government. 
  • He wanted to learn Jay-Z’s likability. Don’t all of us want to be better?

There were a few moments when I felt like I should’ve been high or Kanye got too high before the interview. 

    • God told him to wear a kilt. I didn’t know the Lord influenced fashion choices. 
    • Tupac of Product. I’ve listened to the interview 3 times and I still don’t know what that means or what it’s supposed to mean. If you know please let me know. 
    • World War Z. If this is WWZ how did I miss wars A through Y? 
    • Eve, Adam, illegal nudity. I’m with Charlamagne in my confusion. Someone who wants to sell clothing shouldn’t be upset that being naked is illegal. 
    • Hunger Games. File this in the same drawer as the “Tupac of Product.”

If I were directing the Yeezy’s movie I’d insert the intro “Money, Power, Respect ” where Lil Kim says “First you get the money, then you get the power. After you get the power ***** gonna respect you.” It is easy to call Kanye crazy. However, if you take out the parts about Kim being Marilyn Monroe and the desire for a White trash video and think about his point about the billionaires he’s actually on to something. Lucky for you, I did the research so you don’t have to. I checked Forbes. Kanye is right about there being 7 Black billionaires. They are:

  • Oprah $2.8B
  • Aliko Dangote, Nigeria, Sugar/Flour & Cement $16.1B
  • Mohammed Al-Amoudi, Saudi Arabia, Oil $13.5B
  • Mike Adenuga, Nigeria, Oil $4.7B
  • Patrice Motsepe, South Africa, Mines $2.9B
  • Isabel Dos Santos, Angola, Investments $2B
  • Mo Ibrahim, Sudan/Britain, Investments $1.1B  

Now that we know the only 7 Black billionaires names according to Forbes, let’s think. 4 of the top 10 richest people in the world are Waltons, of  Walmart fame. Each of them are worth about $32 billion. In other White people stay winning news, let us not forget that if King, I mean, Mayor Bloomberg lost $28 billion he would still have Oprah’s money. This made me remember Chris Rock’s “I’m not talking about rich. I’m talking about wealth skit.” If you’re unfamiliar with it check it out here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kglXIoiXDFM. 

Finally, I really need to understand why Kanye kept cheer-leading for Drake. He said it’s Drake season multiple times. To that I say “since when?” Do you feel like it’s Canadian, biracial, Jewish, actor, rapper/singer season? Let’s file that under the visionary stream of consciousness. After this interview I wish MTV still did “Diary.” I’d love a few days worth of Kanye Crazy. I’m not a God but I am a little crazy which is why I’m into Kanye-type rants. Thanksgiving is upon us. We should be thankful that Kanye feels marginalized enough to give us Olympic level crazy.   

What are your thoughts on the interview? Loved it? Hated it? Comment below and let me know!  

Jigga Who?

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Photo from Studio43.com

Photo from Studio43.com

Hello Lovers,

Have you listened to Constitution Ten Commandments, Dead Sea Scrolls 95 Theses, Magna Carta Holy Grail? Did you see Jay-Z on Bill Maher? Did you see the “film” that followed on HBO? Let’s discuss!

When I heard the title “Magna Carta Holy Grail” I came up with a theory. The theory is, Jay-Z needs to leave us alone, musically. After listening to Emancipation Proclamation I Have A Dream, I mean Magna Carta Holy Grail, multiple times, I think my theory is correct. Jay-Z is in the Michael Jordan Wizards stage of his rap career. Magna Carta Holy Grail actually drained me. As I listened to “Tom Ford” I thought “maybe if you popped molly this song would be more interesting.”

Am I the only one who found it a little creepy when he said “twerk Miley” at the end of “Somewhere in America?” Miley is about 20-21 and Jay-Z is 43 aka old enough to be her daddy. Further, Miley is already running around saying she wants a “Black sound,” lines like that just encourage her and I’m not here for it.

I’m also tired of the Jay-Z Beyonce collaborations. I know there are some members of the Beyhive who will read this. . .just hear me out before you attempt to snatch my wig. Jay-Z and Beyonce songs used to be amazing, “Upgrade U” and “’03 Bonnie & Clyde” were great songs. Part II or whatever it’s called is a yawn. What many bandwagon rap Beyhive fans tend to forget is that “’03 Bonnie & Clyde” was a remake of a Tupac song. A remake is good. A remake of a remake; not so much. I guess Beyonce whispering “bad bitch” was something we don’t get her from very often but I could live without it. I could also live without him referring to her as his “baby mama” even if she is harder than a lot these ^199a$.

I decided for sure that Jay-Z was out of material when he referred to Foxy Brown in “Picasso Baby.” Foxy Brown is on Instagram trying to sell virgin hair; the same business as Cam’ron’s fiancee. Nas accused Jay-Z of messing with Foxy Brown on Ether.  Who waits so long to address a rumor? It’s become clear that when it comes to Jay-Z’s music the problem isn’t his flow, the problem is his dough.

 

When I heard Jay-Z performed the same song for 6 hours, le sigh was my reaction. When I heard that a band, The National, had already done that I was baffled. Jay-Z used to start things. Now, he’s doing things other artists have already done. When I saw that it would be a film on HBO I got curious. I had so many questions. Is it hard physically to perform for so long? Did he take water breaks? Did he have to put special soles in his construction Wheat Timbs? Was he lip syncing? I could continue.

After I watched the “film” and Bill Maher none of my questions were answered; not 1. First of all, I think it is a stretch to call 15 minutes a “film.” Wasn’t the B.I.G. full length “hypnotize” video about the same length and it was just a music video? What I don’t understand is how Jay-Z gave us 15 minutes about something that probably should have been 30 minutes or an hour but Beyonce gave us 90 minutes on something that could’ve been done in 15 minutes.

On Bill Maher, Jay-Z spoke about rap and art’s common underground history. I was actually looking forward to his “film” being artsy and intellectual. I thought there would interviews with Marina Abramovic, David Blaine or Lady Gaga about performances. Instead we got a highlight reel of celebrities and some less well known artists with no mention that he was actually there doing the same song for 6 hours. I saw very little art and very little intellect. I actually would’ve been more satisfied with a rerun of Jay-Z’s first HBO event back when Freeway was on his label. That concert had special guests like Missy and performances of songs that were actually good.

After seeing the “film” I just want to resurrect the old Jay-Z.  The “I want a chick who practice Tai Chi but still can buy weed” Jay-Z. The “we don’t believe you, you need more people” Jay-Z. The “if your man got you baggin’ up it could be worse, just put a little in the baggie, a little in the purse” Jay-Z. The “I’m not a businessman I’m a business…man” Jay-Z. The “I am a hustler baby, I can sell water to a whale” Jay-Z. I’d even settle for the “You got Baby money, keep it real with niggas, niggas ain’t got my lady money” Jay-Z.

After Magna Carter Holy Grail and “Picasso Baby” I think Jay-Z should focus on raising Blue Ivy, sending young women fancy cars, and sports management.

Did you see Picasso Baby? Did you listen to Magna Carta Holy Grail? What did you think? Is Jay-Z the rap Gaga or rap Grandpa?

Comment below and let me know!

Rasheeda, call me

Posted in Music, Random, Reality TV by
Rasheeda's Twitter selfie

Rasheeda’s Twitter selfie

Hey Lovers, 

Since today is a holiday let me start by saying Happy Independence Day! Since I’m off today like you probably are, I told myself I was not going to blog. That was true until I was going through my inbox and found Rasheeda’s video. The video was posted on Worldstar Hip Hop of course. I posted the video below for you to see. Normally this is the point where I say we should discuss it. After you watch it, you’ll see there’s not much to discuss. I just ask all of you to DM Rasheeda my number because she clearly is lacking in the ideas arena and I have plenty.

When we first saw the video shoot on Love & Hip Hop I thought the main problem was going to be the fact that a middle age woman pregnant woman was going to be rapping about a sexual position. After watching the video it’s apparent that the pregnancy is not the problem; Rasheeda’s vocabulary is. I really do not know what kind of GED lyrics those were but I could not deal. I’m actually sure that this video was the first time I’ve heard a Rasheeda song and Lord willing it will be my last.

After seeing this video I think Rasheeda needs to stick to that ratchet clothing line and get into the weave and makeup business because there is no way those raps will ever anywhere other than Worldstar.

What do you think of Rasheeda’s “rhymes?” Comment below and let me know!   

Thera-shade!

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By now you’ve probably heard about Kanye West’s new song “Theraflu” first brought to us by the Big Dog Pitbull (I don’t know if he still uses that line but just roll with me) Funkmaster Flex. The song is with DJ Khaled and produced by the same genius who brought us N*99a$ in Paris. If you haven’t heard it click: http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=iv&src_vid=s6rUSuGKXns&annotation_id=annotation_198187&v=xy4DRxN1j1M to listen. The addicting beat is not what brings me to write about this. The mass amount of shade is. 

As someone who is an avid reality TV junkie and hip hop fan I think I can provide some analysis to people who are only one or the other. Let’s discuss! 

I really think this song should have been called “Nyquil” because I needed a deep sleep after Kanye spit the following:

And the whole industry wanna fuck yo’ old chick
Only nigga I got respect for is Wiz
And I’ll admit, I fell in love with Kim
‘Round the same time she had fell in love wit’ him
Well, that’s cool, baby girl, do ya thing
Lucky I ain’t have Jay drop ‘im from the team
La familia, Roc Nation

For those of you who aren’t rap, sports or reality fans allow me to catch you up. Kanye is admitting he fell in love (read: had sexual relations) with E! Reality Star Kim Kardashian while she was falling for Kris Humphries. Kanye then goes on to say Kris is lucky he didn’t have his BFF and my Brooklyn Brother Jay-Z drop him from the Nets. While you may know Jay-Z is part owner of the Nets, before Kim Kardashian, you may not have not known that Kris Humphries plays for the Nets. The “old chick” Kanye mentioned at the beginning is Philly native, former stripper Amber Rose who is now madly in love with Used Q-tip Wiz Khalifa but there were whispers of a brief tryst with none other than Kim’s ex Reggie Bush. 

I have a few theories about all of this. Now that Amber has “verified” Kim was sexting Kanye while they were an item, I’m thinking the whole Reggie & Amber thing might have been a bit of that sweet nectar known as revenge. Well played Ms. Rose; well played. 

After watching so many episodes of the Kardashians on E! I’ll admit, I was very confused after hearing “Theraflu.” From the show it’s clear that Kim will let her pap smear be filmed if she (and her mother) think it will keep her relevant. We also know Kim has an affinity for “dark meat” from her long romance with Reggie Bush. Let us not forget she got “on” by making a sex tape with Brandy’s brother. I thought to myself, why would she marry an unknown, funny looking, racially ambiguous, basketball player from Minnesota if she could’ve had Kanye “Been Crazy” West? I don’t know about you but I’d much rather double date with Jay-Z & Beyonce than Kris Humphries dumpy looking sister. 

My theory is, Kim knows Kanye probably wouldn’t be willing or able to participate in a wedding special and the never ending Kardashian spin offs. I also have the sneaking suspicion her thirst ego wouldn’t allow her to be less famous than her significant other. After all, while Kanye West is crazy like a fox, he’s famous for doing something and Kim calls club appearances “work.”  

Out of this whole thing, I think Amber Rose may be the winner. She tried to turn her 15 minutes of fame into 15 and a half with those songs she made and she’s clearly happy in her current relationship with the anorexic pothead Wiz Khalifa. Good for you Amber, keep living the stripper American Dream.

I think Kanye needs to switch up his meds. On the “Deuces” remix he told us Jay-Z finally convinced him not to run his mouth so when anyone asks who, he doesn’t know who they’re talking about. But last night, he talked about several people who no one else was talking about. We know Kanye has the power to pluck women from obscurity and make them known to all of us after he takes them to Fashion Week, dumps them then raps about them but gets upset when people ask him about it interviews. Let’s just keep him away from Magic City, King of Diamonds and Sue’s Rendezvous (those are strip clubs for those of you who are unaware). This bitter ex role is not what I want from him. While it is entertaining, I feel like he’s one melt down away from going “Chris Brown.” I want the “George Bush doesn’t like Black people” Kanye back. 

Forever Young?

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Now that MTV, BET and VH1 are mostly out of the music business it’s rare that I see any videos. Over the weekend I came across Beyonce’s video for “Party” on the VH1 Top 20 Countdown. Of course after 1 second Beyonce managed to astonish me. No, I don’t mean by letting her sister get in the video with those Janet Jackson in Poet Justice braids, but that kind of offended my eyes too. The first line I remember was “I may be young but I’m ready.” It made me think, at what age can you no longer call yourself young? Beyonce is 30.

Obviously since living beyond 80 is no longer uncommon, 30 is not old but is it still young? As I write this, I’m starting to think maybe I over think pop music. Maybe the problem isn’t that a 30 year old woman is calling herself young. Maybe the problem is me, a person who thinks lyrics should make some kind of sense. I am just as befuddled  now as I was when Mrs. Jay-Z made “single ladies.”  As usual, I digress.

Back to the original topic. I was always told that you want to take of yourself while you are young so that you won’t look like an old shoe as age. We know that we’ll always be relatively young since there never seems to be a shortage of old people. I’ve witnessed women say things like “I’m not old, I’m 37.” I think to myself, “you may not be ‘old’ but young has left you too.” That might be mean of me but I’m still a work in progress. Pray for me.

I still really need to know. Is calling yourself young the way to make sure you are always as young as you feel? Or, is calling yourself young after 30 a stretch?

Occupy All Streets?

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Over the weekend I learned Rocawear is now selling “Occupy All Streets” shirts for $22 and there’s been no talk of any proceeds going to the Occupy Movement. Some people find this offensive and are saying less than flattering things about my Brooklyn Brethren, Jay-Z. I do not share those sentiments because I’m jaded to say the least. Let’s start with fact Jay-Z sold Rocawear in 2007 for over $200 million (fact courtesy of VH1’s Pop Up Video). If you were unaware, that 1 deal alone would make him part of the 1%. Add the money he made for those sneakers, 40/40, and all of  his #1 albums, then you can see why he remixed Weezy’s song talking about a “Billie a billionaire.” I digress. I spoke of Rocawear’s sale to say since Jay-Z is no longer an owner and isn’t really designer, he may not even know about these shirts.

You’re probably thinking “of course he knows,” and with that I would probably agree. Think of this like the time Beyonce did songs with Lady Gaga. Some people claimed Mrs. Carter didn’t need to collaborate with Gaga. The truth is, just like Bey did a video with lesbian undertones (I mean really, if that honey bun scene wasn’t gay, I don’t know what is) to stay relevant, it isn’t surprising that Jay-Z or arm of something of which he’s affiliated did the same thing to stay relevant with the most popular protest that did start in the street; arguably just like Jay-Z did.

I’m like you, and I like to think Jay-Z in addition to being from the ‘hood is for the ‘hood. In ’08 after paying $200 to see him at the Garden, Hov told me to vote for Obama and I did. I was going to vote for Obama anyway because I didn’t think McCain had the right life expectancy to have his finger on the button that we hear so much about. Jay-Z has given out toys in the projects on Christmas day. In addition to doing a concert to benefit The Firefighters, Hov also gave money to help victims of Hurricane Katrina.

No one can deny Jay-Z has done good things with his money and influence. Well, Newark might disagree since in true BK fashion, Jay-Z took the Nets. Again, I digress. My point is that while we like to think that Jay-Z is still for the 99% he’s part of the 1%. When someone has enough money to call themselves the Black Warren Buffet we shouldn’t put anything past them. After all, what we call money he pays more in taxes.

UPDATE

After writing the above post, I came across this image and knew I had to share. As the picture shows, Jay-Z is VERY familiar with the “all streets” version of the Occupy shirts. Does this change anything for me? No. As I told you originally, Jay-Z is part of the 1% and staying relevant is his bread and butter so I’m not surprised. The rich will always do things to get richer. Further, I think hijacking a movement for your own purposes takes nerve and anyone who knows me, knows I’m always impressed with people who exhibit that kind of self aggrandizement.

I Watched the Throne


The brief point when Yeezy took off the skants or dants I'm not sure what to call them

Monday night I saw Jay-Z and Kanye West at the Garden. Below is a little recap with some of my random thoughts that you love. . .

Celeb sightings:

  • Russell Simmons
  • Diddy
  • Fabolous

D List sightings:

  • Cheetah Girl Adrienne, used to date Rob Kardashian Bailon
  • Emily, baby mother to Fab, ‘star’ of Love & Hip Hop, B.
  • AJ used to host 106 & Park Calloway
  • Beyonce’s sister, Solange (with her son & boyfriend in tow)
  • Cassie used to be a model, tries to sing and is now Diddy’s toy

Dislikes:
The ticket said showtime was 7:30, please arrive 1 hour early. There was no opening act and no DJ to warm up the crowd. As you can imagine by 9PM when there was NOTHING going on except for applause when Diddy walked through with a big ass entourage, I was ready to hurt someone.
One thing I loved about seeing Jay-Z in the past was all the guest appearances usually whoever is in town like Swizz Beatz or Diddy. Last night there were no guest appearances. None, not one. The only person I didn’t want to see is Beyonce because I’m uninterested in her unless she planned to do single ladies in her leotard while showing the baby bump.

Attire
Both Jay and ‘Ye wore their customized shirts. Jay-Z wore his all black everything. If they are not in Illuminati, they’re definitely trying to make us think that they are. One of the shirts had the Goat of Mendes on it which is said to be an Illuminati symbol.

Leggings. . . Kanye saw Lil Wayne’s jeggings and raised him a leather wrap skirt or perhaps dress. Please tell a friend to tell a friend that this does NOT need to become a trend. When ‘Ye changed into a regular pair of pants then later put the leather legging wrap skirt concoction back on with some kinda Mayan Azetec 2012 looking jacket, shirt combo I almost died. Cross dressing cannot become a new trend. I still have not recovered from the LV coin purses that are now being rocked by men. I’m blaming that on Chris Brown. I digress. . .

We must unite against this!

Song Selection
I was pleased that they did all the Watch the Throne songs including my favorite “niggas in Paris” which they did like 3 and a half times. They each did some of their most popular songs. They both took it way back. . like College Drop Out, Reasonable Doubt way back which was amazing. You can tell who the real fans were. Everyone know 99 problems but who can tell who is who by who if you can finish the line from “I’m from the other side where other guys don’t walk too much. . .” or “I wear a G on my chest I don’t need. . . ”

Gossip
While Kim Porter has Diddy’s kids it appears, Cassie gets the good concert tickets. She was two steps behind him with her horse looking ponytailed Mohawk invention.
Solange is a Carol’s Daughter spokesperson. You’d think she would’ve used some Hair Milk on that nappy natural hair of her’s. Her son needs a haircut too. If she’s going to live in Brooklyn she needs to do as Brooklynites do. She should get his haircut and get those waves spinning, crazy hair on little Black kids is only ok in Gap commercials.
While Emily says in the Love & Hip Hop preview that she’s done with Fab, last night she was so close to him you would’ve thought she was his security. Oh I forgot, she’s his stylist. Interestingly enough, on Love & Hip Hop she claimed Cheetah girl and Chipped Tooth smashed. Yet, last night she was standing right behind Fab while he yucked it up with the Kardashian ex.

The Crowd
It appears that Jay and ‘Ye have priced out the Black and Brown masses. Good seats were $250. Prime seats were $300. There were so many guidos, guidettes, dude bros, and old folks in there I thought I was trapped in a retirement community staffed by Jersey Shore rejects. If you need an app to find the names of each song, you’re probably at the wrong concert ::I’m just sayin’::

My favorite: HGM (Hot Ghetto Mess)
Why is it that every time I attend a rap concert, I can’t leave without a contact high? I don’t know about y’all but at $250 a pop, I want to be perfectly sober so I don’t miss a thing.
Third Place HGM award: Girl with a tired weave who got drunk, spilled her drink, asked for another drink for free to replace the spilled drink then got upset when they refused. Anyway, drunk girl was wearing an Herve Lerger bandage wanna be dress with mesh cut outs. Midway through the show she stumbled out from her seat with her. . .wait for it . . .NIPPLE showing through one of the mesh cut outs. At first I thought my eyes were lying. They weren’t. The HGM was confirmed by other witnesses.

Second Place: Seat Sneakers

If you paid for the cheap seats, stay in your cheap seats. I didn’t pay my hard earned money for you and your synthetic Janet Jackson in Poetic Justice looking braids to block my view.

First Place: The Groupies
We know music and sporting events bring out the groupies in large numbers. However, if you’re trying to get chose by a real baller you should probably invest in better seats. I can promise you that no one anywhere near note worthy is seating in the 300 section at the Garden. If you paid under $100 for your ticket, just wear something sensible and comfortable. You’re going to need it for the endless escalators to get to your cheap seats.

A group of groupies were on their way out as I was leaving. Next thing you know, we see aforementioned groupies in their faux fur, half naked and turned over shoes jumping, yes jumping a guy in the middle of 7th avenue as the light was turning green. Of course they got swarmed by cops after trying to run them. Why can’t people leave the ‘hood in the ‘hood for just one night? I know why! They’re niggas in midtown. . .
Overall I had a great time however I don’t know if I’ll be buying anymore Jay-Z tickets in the near future. The new seats and wider rows at the Garden are great but no opener and waiting for 2 hours is more than I would like to endure on a Monday night.