The “Fast Girl” label fails Black Girls


It’s been forever, I know. I’ve missed this platform but #SurvivingRKelly has brought me out of writing retirement. I originally planned on skipping the R. Kelly docu-series altogether because we know what he is at this point. The cult story came out nearly 2 years ago and that was 20 years after he married Aaliyah at age 15 but the social media discussions were so widely varied, I got curious. 

The documentary presents so many issues which deserve further examination but I want to focus on the narrative about the fast/fass girl” angle. In my part of the African-American community, fast was literally the worst thing you could be or be perceived to be as a young girl. In short, a “fast” girl is a girl who is a sexual being. If you’re unfamiliar with the term, just imagine a less sophisticated but way more problematic version of slut-shaming. I’ve been slut-shamed as an adult and accused of being “fast” as a child. Being accused of being fast was way, way, way worse. Continue reading

Love & Hip Hop Hollywood Season 5 Premiere Brain Drops


Hey Lovers, 

I know it’s been forever. I come to you as a humble servant of the Lord and ask for your forgiveness. Last night, I reluctantly watched the season premiere of Love & Hip Hop Hollywood. After Ms. Mona disrespected with the last couple seasons of Love & Hip Hop. Keep reading for some of my thoughts.  Continue reading

Review: We Should All Be Feminists

flawlessHey Lovers, 

Happy New Year! One of my goals for 2017 is to read more. For Christmas, I got a Kindle. My first purchase was “We Should All Be Feminists” by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie. Feminism has had more than 15 minutes of fame recently. Like most of the world, I first learned of Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie when she was featured on Beyonce’s song “Flawless.” What I did not know was the excerpt we hear in “Flawless” was adopted from a TED Talk. Unlike most of the world, I prefer to read about things before I go labeling myself willy nilly. 

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Liforme yoga mat, save or splurge?


Hey Lovers,

You know I’ve been on the fitness wave lately. Out of all the workouts I’ve tried, it’s been the hardest to get into yoga. I was ready to skip yoga altogether until my chiropractor recommended it because I need to strengthen my back muscles which will help with my chronic pain.  

Hot vinyasa flow is my favorite as well as the fusion class at Sync studio. Growing in my practice I’ve learned that all yoga mats are not created equal. The more I practiced the more I noticed the little things like slippage during down-dog and the need for support. After finding a couple classes I enjoy I decided it was time to invest in a good yoga mat since I would be a repeat customer. I did tons of research. The names that kept coming up were MandukaJadeGaiam and LuLuLemon. I started following a bunch of Black yogis on Instagram and that’s how I learned about the Liforme yoga mat. At first I balked at the idea of paying over $100 for a yoga mat. Thankfully, I was able to try out the Jade and Manduka mats at a couple studios. The Manduka had good thickness but I still had some slipping. The Jade mats were thick but heavy so it wouldn’t be practical to carry along with a gym bag and the things I need for my workday. After seeing a review on Youtube I finally decided to bite the bullet and get the Liforme travel mat. It costs $115, weighs 3.5lbs and comes with a mat bag. The only difference between the travel mat is the thickness a few millimeters of length and width and the weight. I opted for the travel mat because there are days where I go to yoga after work and I need everything to be light as possible since I already have to carry 2 laptops with me daily. 

I first used the mat at a hot pilates class. Before, I always used a mat length towel because I would slide and slip without one. With the Liforme mat, I actually found myself pulling back the towel to getting a better grip during forearm plank. The stickiness does hold up. I sweat like a beast. The mat absorbed all moisture and remained grippy throughout the entire hour. The mat was just as grippy during a hot vinyasa session the following day. While the mat is thinner that my old no name mat, I didn’t feel stress the same stress on my joints during cat-cow and other all fours positions.  The alignment lines helped me correct myself and better form is always better. I also didn’t realize how much time I wasted worrying about slipping until I no longer worried about slipping with the Liforme mat.   

The Liforme does not have an odor when you first get it and it does come with a booklet of directions about cleaning and care for the mat. So, if you have a regular yoga or pilates practice at home or in a studio that doesn’t give complimentary mats I say; splurge.

Have you ever splurged on a yoga mat? What kind was it? How did it work? Comment below and let me know!      



Meet me at the barre

BarreHey Lovers,

As you know from some of my “recent” posts, I’ve really been into fitness lately which is never a phrase I pictured myself saying even 2 years ago. You can check out some of my older fitness related posts here and here.
I’ve tried a ton of classes. I’ve tried, bikram yoga, vinyasa yoga, hot vinyasa, pilates, Hot HIIT pilates, barre, sculpting, cardio, circuit, etc. By far barre is my favorite workout. It’s my favorite for a few reasons. First, you can’t look at a person’s size and tell whether or not they’ll be good. I’ve seen thick girls bust splits and thin girls give up. It’s also very effective for women’s bodies. Barre makes the body leaner and more toned without creating bulk. I saw the quickest results after joining a barre studio. Keep reading for a few thoughts on the barre studios I’ve visited. 

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ClassPass Month 1 Review

img_5904Hey Lovers,

I know I’ve been totally inconsistent for the last several (7) months. As I joked on Facebook, I’m basically the Frank Ocean of blogging. Please forgive me. Now that work is calm-ish, I can get back to a semi-regular writing schedule.

Switching jobs caused me to lose my cheap membership at New York Health & Racquet Club; RIP. Since I need classes as opposed to just doing my own thing in a gym, I joined Physique 57. After my 3 months at Physique, I was looking for something else mainly because of the way my bank account is set up. In comes ClassPass. If you didn’t know, ClassPass is a third party service that charges you a monthly flat fee but gives you access to hundreds of gyms and studios. While prices are location based, you can use your membership in another city. I have the NYC unlimited plan. It costs $200/month and allows you to visit each studio up to 3 times. Keep reading for a rundown of the classes and studios I visited during my first month.

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Thick Chick Workout Tips

Hey Lovers,

It’s been awhile, I know. Life. Anyway, because the Internet never forgets, Facebook decided to remind me of my chunky days. Before this “memory” I felt like I looked basically the same. However, you see the progress. Let’s discuss. 

Before-AfterI have always said that I have reverse body dysmorphia. By reverse I mean, no matter what my weight is, I think I look the same. My clothes have a tendency to disagree. Haters, I know. Like most other Americans, I eat my feelings. After I finished law school in 2012 I was unemployed for about 7 months. I had nothing but time. Time to think. Time to think about my feelings; then eat them. By the time I got a job in 2013, my weight had ballooned to nearly 190lbs and a size 14/16. At 5’4, 190lbs is fat. Don’t get me wrong; I was still cute. I was cute but also fat. I used my first paycheck to join Weight Watchers. My goal was to get back to my “normal” weight which was somewhere around 165lbs and a size 12. img_3157
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